Sunday, May 13, 2012
Happy Mother's Day to an Unknown Mom
For the past couple of weeks, I have had a burden for a woman with whom I've never met! This Mother's Day has been so wonderful and yet I am sad for this lady who is probably getting no recognition today.
You see, in September 2oo9, this woman made the ultimate sacrifice. Because of her decision, I am Mommy to an amazing little girl today.
Before we adopted Lynleigh, I had this view of Chinese women that in honesty, was very negative. I thought they were ok with "throwing away" their little girls in an effort to have the coveted baby boy. I thought they did it heartlessly without looking back. And because of my stupidity, I felt like I was doing them a favor by adopting. Since bringing Lynleigh home, I have read several books on the subject and have since learned so much about the Unknown Chinese Mother.
These two books have changed my opinion about Lynleigh's birth mom and the many more women hurting because of the one child policy.
Silent Tears is about an American woman who lived in China for four years. In her time there, she volunteered for an orphanage. She tells of the babies who came and went, and by went I meant mostly died. She talked about the families that abandoned the little girls. And she tells about the heart break she endured during her time there.
This next book just about killed me to read. It's a journalists' tale of meeting with the mother's who were forced to kill or abandon their little girls so that the family could try again for a boy. Could you imagine killing your own child? She also opened my eyes to the extremely high numbers of female suicide in China. It's higher there than any other country. Want to take a guess why?
Both books are hard to read but yet, I wish I could put one in every set of hands I came across!
Somewhere in this province, there is a mother who is probably crying her own silent tears. She is probably thinking of her little girl that she only was able to hold for a short time. She doesn't know that her palate has been corrected. She doesn't know that her baby is using a breathing machine to help with her asthma...for that matter, she probably doesn't even know she has asthma. And she doesn't know that her little girl has a love for Elmo and Rapunzel like no other.
Happy Mother's Day to an Unknown Mother! With out your sacrifice, I would not be the mommy of a sweet, silly, and stubborn little girl! Thank you from the bottom of my heart. You will never know what you have done for our family or how much of blessing you are to us!
Wednesday, April 18, 2012
Heavy Heart
I know that my posts are usually witty stories of how crazy life is with three kids but tonight I just had to get some thoughts out of my head and on paper (so to speak).
About two weeks ago, I learned about two of my former students who had recently become parents. They are out of school and were trying to begin a life together...this relationship began 4 years ago in my 9th grade classroom. These kids are two of my favorites. Super smart and just cool kids to be around. They were blessed with a sweet and totally adorable little boy. Just hours after the baby was born, he was taken to the local children's hospital with an abnormal windpipe.
I remember reading this post on the dad's Facebook and thinking..."Oh, they will be just fine!" Then about a week or so later, I contacted them to see how the baby was doing. I learned that he had a condition that caused him to have fluid on his brain among many other issues. I became witness to two people that I still looked at like children themselves become strong adults for the sake of their kid. Wow! It was amazing to see not only how much they loved this little boy but also how much they were willing to sacrifice to take care of him. I put him on our prayer list at church and went straight to the big guns of prayer in my life.
I was fortunate enough to be able to visit these sweet parents and the baby in the hospital and while it broke my heart for them, I have never been prouder of two people. I left the hospital that day with a huge burden for this family and made it my mission to send them a support team! That's one of the cool things about my church family! When there is a need...it gets filled! People started asking me how they could help and soon this family was getting visits from strangers and meals taken care of! I was just so impressed.
Today, I contacted the mom just to see how sweet baby boy was doing and the news I got was not good. She said that the doctors had told them that he would not be getting better and that they needed to make the decision on the next step. They have made the hardest decision that I could never imagine making and have decided to take him off life support. I'm so broken for this family! And after talking to a friend tonight, it's got me thinking about another who made the ultimate sacrifice!
I often look at my kids and ask God how he could knowingly put his son on earth and then allow him to become the sacrifice for me! I don't think I could ever do that...and here I sit in my selfish world while someone I know is being asked to give up her son!
As if this situation isn't enough to break ones heart, I started reading a blog entry about a little boy who has been adopted into his forever family and the mom asked the question, "Is there a mother's day in China?" This started the crazy thinking in my head about another woman who had to give her child up...but instead of knowing that this baby would be ok (like my friend's baby will be in the hands of God) this mother gave up her baby with only the hopes that she would be ok. How do these women do it and why does it even have to happen? I mean, I know that if that woman in China wouldn't have made the sacrifice, I wouldn't have my baby girl. I get it...but I'm just left here with a million questions tonight...and they all begin with the word, WHY?
I'm not really looking for any answers and if you are still with me, thanks for listening tonight. I just wanted to lay the burden for a family that has been on my heart for a few weeks on your heart too. And I wanted to say to that mom as well as the mom on the other side of the world that your babies will be ok! God is good all the time and while we may never know the answers here on Earth, HE knows them all and one day he may share them with us when we are with him for eternity!
About two weeks ago, I learned about two of my former students who had recently become parents. They are out of school and were trying to begin a life together...this relationship began 4 years ago in my 9th grade classroom. These kids are two of my favorites. Super smart and just cool kids to be around. They were blessed with a sweet and totally adorable little boy. Just hours after the baby was born, he was taken to the local children's hospital with an abnormal windpipe.
I remember reading this post on the dad's Facebook and thinking..."Oh, they will be just fine!" Then about a week or so later, I contacted them to see how the baby was doing. I learned that he had a condition that caused him to have fluid on his brain among many other issues. I became witness to two people that I still looked at like children themselves become strong adults for the sake of their kid. Wow! It was amazing to see not only how much they loved this little boy but also how much they were willing to sacrifice to take care of him. I put him on our prayer list at church and went straight to the big guns of prayer in my life.
I was fortunate enough to be able to visit these sweet parents and the baby in the hospital and while it broke my heart for them, I have never been prouder of two people. I left the hospital that day with a huge burden for this family and made it my mission to send them a support team! That's one of the cool things about my church family! When there is a need...it gets filled! People started asking me how they could help and soon this family was getting visits from strangers and meals taken care of! I was just so impressed.
Today, I contacted the mom just to see how sweet baby boy was doing and the news I got was not good. She said that the doctors had told them that he would not be getting better and that they needed to make the decision on the next step. They have made the hardest decision that I could never imagine making and have decided to take him off life support. I'm so broken for this family! And after talking to a friend tonight, it's got me thinking about another who made the ultimate sacrifice!
I often look at my kids and ask God how he could knowingly put his son on earth and then allow him to become the sacrifice for me! I don't think I could ever do that...and here I sit in my selfish world while someone I know is being asked to give up her son!
As if this situation isn't enough to break ones heart, I started reading a blog entry about a little boy who has been adopted into his forever family and the mom asked the question, "Is there a mother's day in China?" This started the crazy thinking in my head about another woman who had to give her child up...but instead of knowing that this baby would be ok (like my friend's baby will be in the hands of God) this mother gave up her baby with only the hopes that she would be ok. How do these women do it and why does it even have to happen? I mean, I know that if that woman in China wouldn't have made the sacrifice, I wouldn't have my baby girl. I get it...but I'm just left here with a million questions tonight...and they all begin with the word, WHY?
I'm not really looking for any answers and if you are still with me, thanks for listening tonight. I just wanted to lay the burden for a family that has been on my heart for a few weeks on your heart too. And I wanted to say to that mom as well as the mom on the other side of the world that your babies will be ok! God is good all the time and while we may never know the answers here on Earth, HE knows them all and one day he may share them with us when we are with him for eternity!
Monday, April 9, 2012
Baby's First Easter
My mom and I were out shopping this weekend and every time I saw a shirt that said, "Baby's first Easter," I pointed it out to her that none of them came in Lynleigh's size! I guess there isn't a big market for two year olds celebrating their first Easter.
Well, the one at our house did celebrate hers and though I'm sure she really didn't get the whole idea...she loved getting gifts! My mom comes to town about every three or four months and my boys have been trained to know that Gamma brings gifts! So, as soon as she walked in the door, Kaden was already digging in her suitcase! Needless to say, Ren has learned that the suitcase has surprises for her and she was right there with Kaden digging away!
This weekend we celebrated Kaden's birthday. I'm not posting all the pics right now because I pretty much posted them all on Facebook during the party. We also went to church this weekend and had an egg hunt at my aunt's house. Those pics are already on FB too so I thought I'd post the ones from the kids' Easter shoot.
Brady and Kaden loved these with the black background. I wasn't a fan but I thought I'd post them to make the boys happy.
There were about 100 pictures to choose from and it took me forever to figure out the ones I wanted. I was pretty impressed at how well Ren did. We tried to have pictures taken at Christmas and she didn't want anything to do with it.
Well, the one at our house did celebrate hers and though I'm sure she really didn't get the whole idea...she loved getting gifts! My mom comes to town about every three or four months and my boys have been trained to know that Gamma brings gifts! So, as soon as she walked in the door, Kaden was already digging in her suitcase! Needless to say, Ren has learned that the suitcase has surprises for her and she was right there with Kaden digging away!
This weekend we celebrated Kaden's birthday. I'm not posting all the pics right now because I pretty much posted them all on Facebook during the party. We also went to church this weekend and had an egg hunt at my aunt's house. Those pics are already on FB too so I thought I'd post the ones from the kids' Easter shoot.
Brady and Kaden loved these with the black background. I wasn't a fan but I thought I'd post them to make the boys happy.
There were about 100 pictures to choose from and it took me forever to figure out the ones I wanted. I was pretty impressed at how well Ren did. We tried to have pictures taken at Christmas and she didn't want anything to do with it.
Saturday, March 24, 2012
How Time Flies
Yesterday, I got a text from my best friend asking if it was the one year anniversary of our referral. I actually had to look back at the calender because I couldn't remember. And guess what...it was actually the day before! I'm either a terrible parent or I have three kids! I'm going to pick the second one and say that I can't believe that a year ago we were waiting to see our baby girl for the first time!
I will never forget that day! I was at school with my phone in my hand literally all day! My friends at work were peaking in my room every few minutes asking if we had gotten the call. You see, we didn't get one the month before and I promised myself that I wouldn't be disappointed if we didn't get one again. Then, around 1:30 my phone rang! I looked at the kids in my class and they knew! All of a sudden they start hushing each other and I ran into the room next to mine because that teacher didn't have a class. I don't remember much of the conversation but I think she told me her name was Wei, Ren Yue, she was 18 months old and she had a cleft lip and palate. She told me some other things like how much she weighed and how big her head was but I can't remember at this moment. I still have them written down so I can tell her one day.
Then, I went back into my classroom and called Tony. We both waited for the email to arrive and when I opened it up....this precious face is what I saw!
The ladies at Tony's work were in the back ground ohhing and ahhing...but I was just sitting there crying! Several of my students started to cry as well. It was so cool to have them be a part of our referral day! Some of the things I learned about Wei, Ren Yue that day were that she liked to eat and she could "feed cookies to self." I had no idea how much that would apply to her a year later!
While it doesn't seem like it was a year ago that we first saw her, it seems like she's been with us forever! Today, she weighs 33lbs and is 36 inches tall! She's a "sassy pants" as the doctor said today when we went in for an ear infection and I couldn't agree more! She's the boss of her brothers and a tattle tale of all!
She's starting to talk more and more each day! She can sign more than 30 words but she can say just a few. Some of those include: mama, dada, milk, bath, monkey, bad, Lee Lee (she calls herself)and she can make the sounds of several animals.
She's the greatest thing ever happened to our little family and I couldn't have asked for a more wonderful little person to bless our lives!
I will never forget that day! I was at school with my phone in my hand literally all day! My friends at work were peaking in my room every few minutes asking if we had gotten the call. You see, we didn't get one the month before and I promised myself that I wouldn't be disappointed if we didn't get one again. Then, around 1:30 my phone rang! I looked at the kids in my class and they knew! All of a sudden they start hushing each other and I ran into the room next to mine because that teacher didn't have a class. I don't remember much of the conversation but I think she told me her name was Wei, Ren Yue, she was 18 months old and she had a cleft lip and palate. She told me some other things like how much she weighed and how big her head was but I can't remember at this moment. I still have them written down so I can tell her one day.
Then, I went back into my classroom and called Tony. We both waited for the email to arrive and when I opened it up....this precious face is what I saw!
The ladies at Tony's work were in the back ground ohhing and ahhing...but I was just sitting there crying! Several of my students started to cry as well. It was so cool to have them be a part of our referral day! Some of the things I learned about Wei, Ren Yue that day were that she liked to eat and she could "feed cookies to self." I had no idea how much that would apply to her a year later!
While it doesn't seem like it was a year ago that we first saw her, it seems like she's been with us forever! Today, she weighs 33lbs and is 36 inches tall! She's a "sassy pants" as the doctor said today when we went in for an ear infection and I couldn't agree more! She's the boss of her brothers and a tattle tale of all!
She's starting to talk more and more each day! She can sign more than 30 words but she can say just a few. Some of those include: mama, dada, milk, bath, monkey, bad, Lee Lee (she calls herself)and she can make the sounds of several animals.
She's the greatest thing ever happened to our little family and I couldn't have asked for a more wonderful little person to bless our lives!
Saturday, March 17, 2012
Where The Heck Have I Been?
Yes! That's what I have been hearing at church! I haven't blogged in forever it seems. Well, that will change (yeah right) because we got a new computer today!
This week was spring break so I made sure the kids were busy every day, and that included our planned "clean your room" day! Since I haven't blogged in a few weeks, I had tons of pictures to go through and narrow down. So, hang on, this may take a while.
We didn't have any snow this January so the kids and I were able to enjoy all of the planned holidays. On President's Day, I braved the zoo along with three little monkeys.
It was a moderately warm day and we had a blast!
Brady was chosen to compete with our AWANA olymipcs team this year so one Saturday, we enjoyed some "nerd games" as I named them! Lynleigh and I didn't last very long but before she was whiny, tired, and ready for a nap, I was able to get a few good pictures of her.
Though she would never let you know it, she loves her big brother, Kaden! They have junk food in common so that's about the only time they get along. Well, let me rephrase that...he wants to get along with her all the time. She, on the other hand, tolerates him at best! She's so mean to him and I know it hurts his feelings but he still thinks she hung the moon!
This guy...
Also thinks she hung the moon! She also tolerates him too! Well, let me rephrase that...she likes him in waves. Some days, she's the biggest Daddy's girl and others she gives him the hand and says Uh-huh!
Today, my step dad said, "It's amazing what a little hair has done for that girl!" And he's right! Her hair has gotten long enough that I can get it into little pig tails! It's so cute and she just loved having her hair like this. Well, she loved the attention this hair do got her!
As I mentioned, this week was Spring Break. The weather was great! Nearly 80 every day so we took advantage of that and headed back to the zoo. We have a pass so we go there a lot!
One of the cool new attractions this year is feeding the giraffes. On Sunday's and Wednesday's you can feed them. We got there early and were honored with this view!
We were so close! I couldn't believe how cool this was. I thought for sure Miss Thang would freak out! You never can tell with her and today must have been her good day! She loved it and was really mad when we ran out of food!
Since it was Spring Break, everyone had the same idea and we had to wait in line for about 20 minutes before we got our turn. While we waited, we were entertained with the monkeys.
Oh, sorry, I meant we were entertained with my children!
And Lynleigh played with her best friend Belle. By the way, Belle's parents are currently in the process of adopting a little girl from China! They just started and I'm so excited for them!
Sorry, ADD moment. Back to the zoo. Lynleigh LOVED feeding the giraffes!
And as always, I tried to get a picture of her with the pandas. I have one of each of the boys but for some reason (probably that she's tired by the time we get there) I can't seem to get her to pose in front of the panda room. So, I compromised and got in the picture with her!
All in all, we had a great Spring Break and I'm kinda sad to see it come to an end. On the plus side, we only have nine weeks until school is out and we head to Disney! I can't wait to see her reaction there!
This week was spring break so I made sure the kids were busy every day, and that included our planned "clean your room" day! Since I haven't blogged in a few weeks, I had tons of pictures to go through and narrow down. So, hang on, this may take a while.
We didn't have any snow this January so the kids and I were able to enjoy all of the planned holidays. On President's Day, I braved the zoo along with three little monkeys.
It was a moderately warm day and we had a blast!
Brady was chosen to compete with our AWANA olymipcs team this year so one Saturday, we enjoyed some "nerd games" as I named them! Lynleigh and I didn't last very long but before she was whiny, tired, and ready for a nap, I was able to get a few good pictures of her.
Though she would never let you know it, she loves her big brother, Kaden! They have junk food in common so that's about the only time they get along. Well, let me rephrase that...he wants to get along with her all the time. She, on the other hand, tolerates him at best! She's so mean to him and I know it hurts his feelings but he still thinks she hung the moon!
This guy...
Also thinks she hung the moon! She also tolerates him too! Well, let me rephrase that...she likes him in waves. Some days, she's the biggest Daddy's girl and others she gives him the hand and says Uh-huh!
Today, my step dad said, "It's amazing what a little hair has done for that girl!" And he's right! Her hair has gotten long enough that I can get it into little pig tails! It's so cute and she just loved having her hair like this. Well, she loved the attention this hair do got her!
As I mentioned, this week was Spring Break. The weather was great! Nearly 80 every day so we took advantage of that and headed back to the zoo. We have a pass so we go there a lot!
One of the cool new attractions this year is feeding the giraffes. On Sunday's and Wednesday's you can feed them. We got there early and were honored with this view!
We were so close! I couldn't believe how cool this was. I thought for sure Miss Thang would freak out! You never can tell with her and today must have been her good day! She loved it and was really mad when we ran out of food!
Since it was Spring Break, everyone had the same idea and we had to wait in line for about 20 minutes before we got our turn. While we waited, we were entertained with the monkeys.
Oh, sorry, I meant we were entertained with my children!
And Lynleigh played with her best friend Belle. By the way, Belle's parents are currently in the process of adopting a little girl from China! They just started and I'm so excited for them!
Sorry, ADD moment. Back to the zoo. Lynleigh LOVED feeding the giraffes!
And as always, I tried to get a picture of her with the pandas. I have one of each of the boys but for some reason (probably that she's tired by the time we get there) I can't seem to get her to pose in front of the panda room. So, I compromised and got in the picture with her!
All in all, we had a great Spring Break and I'm kinda sad to see it come to an end. On the plus side, we only have nine weeks until school is out and we head to Disney! I can't wait to see her reaction there!
Monday, January 30, 2012
There's A First Time For Everything!
This weekend, Lynleigh got her first experience with roller skating! We were invited to my cousin's son's birthday party so I thought this would be a great time to introduce Lyn to something the boys love to do!
We borrowed some little skates from a friend and I just thought for sure she would freak out! But as you can see...she loved it!
The boys of course love skating so Brady had to take some time out to help his little sister!
Kaden was determined to be a big boy and not use the skate helper! He only had a few crashes and shared Lynleigh's but for the most part, he skated all by him self!
And speaking of being big...Miss Thang thought she was big enough to skate on the rink with all the big kids!
I took a million pictures...well maybe not that many but she's such a ham now! This is her "cheese" face she is now making when I tell her to say "cheese!"
I couldn't resist taking a picture of the Toms with the skates on them! Because Toms are awesome and she's so cute in them!
And as our day was coming to a close, Lynleigh decided to just sit on the side line and watch her big brothers show her how it was done!
After a fun time skating we all came home to veg out! Sunday morning, I decided to let Lynleigh wear her silk dress for Chinese New Year. We are a week behind but she's two so she didn't know! She wasn't too thrilled about wearing the dress, but once the boys and I told her how pretty she was she was all about it!
We borrowed some little skates from a friend and I just thought for sure she would freak out! But as you can see...she loved it!
The boys of course love skating so Brady had to take some time out to help his little sister!
Kaden was determined to be a big boy and not use the skate helper! He only had a few crashes and shared Lynleigh's but for the most part, he skated all by him self!
And speaking of being big...Miss Thang thought she was big enough to skate on the rink with all the big kids!
I took a million pictures...well maybe not that many but she's such a ham now! This is her "cheese" face she is now making when I tell her to say "cheese!"
I couldn't resist taking a picture of the Toms with the skates on them! Because Toms are awesome and she's so cute in them!
And as our day was coming to a close, Lynleigh decided to just sit on the side line and watch her big brothers show her how it was done!
After a fun time skating we all came home to veg out! Sunday morning, I decided to let Lynleigh wear her silk dress for Chinese New Year. We are a week behind but she's two so she didn't know! She wasn't too thrilled about wearing the dress, but once the boys and I told her how pretty she was she was all about it!
Friday, January 20, 2012
What A Difference Time Makes!
Wow! Four months ago we got the most precious gift and boy will our lives never be the same! I seriously can't believe that Lynleigh has only been with us for four months! How can that be possible? It seems like she's been here forever!
Tonight, I was looking through pictures because I'm actually scrapbooking tomorrow and I was just stunned at how much Lynleigh has changed in just four short months! Have I said that enough yet?
Look at how thin she is! I can't believe she seemed so big while we were in China! Next to most of the other kids she was a giant!
Now I look at this skinny face and think about how little she looks!
Showing Tony this picture, he said, "That skinny kid doesn't live here anymore!" And not just her size...that little girl who wanted to be held like a baby and drink from a bottle doesn't live here either! To think of it...there are so many things that have changed during the past few months! Let's see...she is sleeping most of the night and will put herself back to sleep without help. She doesn't think she needs to be eating ALL the time now...just most of the time! She's braver than she's ever been with us and will walk into church or the grocery store without crying! she hugs everyone and pats your back when he hugs you!
She's starting to try to talk and loves bossing the boys around! She's a tattle tale (but what little girl isn't) and she's all about being pretty!
She loves...I mean LOVES playing outside with her brothers and is serious about riding her trike!
She's super sweet and in a breath very vindictive! She's all girl and full of drama! She's got all of the men in the house wrapped around her little finger while I see right through her routine! She loves to take a bath and will hit anyone that makes her mad! She's bossy and prissy and sometimes stinky!
We couldn't have ask for a more precious little girl to bless our lives and rock our world!
I could kiss those cheeks a million times and never get tired of that sweet face! Happy 4 months home Lynleigh Ren, we love you more that you'll ever know!!!!
Tonight, I was looking through pictures because I'm actually scrapbooking tomorrow and I was just stunned at how much Lynleigh has changed in just four short months! Have I said that enough yet?
Look at how thin she is! I can't believe she seemed so big while we were in China! Next to most of the other kids she was a giant!
Now I look at this skinny face and think about how little she looks!
Showing Tony this picture, he said, "That skinny kid doesn't live here anymore!" And not just her size...that little girl who wanted to be held like a baby and drink from a bottle doesn't live here either! To think of it...there are so many things that have changed during the past few months! Let's see...she is sleeping most of the night and will put herself back to sleep without help. She doesn't think she needs to be eating ALL the time now...just most of the time! She's braver than she's ever been with us and will walk into church or the grocery store without crying! she hugs everyone and pats your back when he hugs you!
She's starting to try to talk and loves bossing the boys around! She's a tattle tale (but what little girl isn't) and she's all about being pretty!
She loves...I mean LOVES playing outside with her brothers and is serious about riding her trike!
She's super sweet and in a breath very vindictive! She's all girl and full of drama! She's got all of the men in the house wrapped around her little finger while I see right through her routine! She loves to take a bath and will hit anyone that makes her mad! She's bossy and prissy and sometimes stinky!
We couldn't have ask for a more precious little girl to bless our lives and rock our world!
I could kiss those cheeks a million times and never get tired of that sweet face! Happy 4 months home Lynleigh Ren, we love you more that you'll ever know!!!!
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
